Am I a homewrecker?

Dear Leanne,

I had an affair with a married man. I knew he was married and that he had kids. My friends say that he will cheat on me now that I have won him.

What do you think?

Am I a homewrecker?

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

It's a hard realisation to come to that life is like a boomerang right?

I'm sure you already know the answer to this question but are looking for any clarification that it is not what you know it is. But it is. You are a homewrecker.

I'm going to be completely honest with you here.

You're a very selfish woman.

It's one thing for a man to cheat on his wife, but it's another thing for a woman to allow herself to be the person he cheats with. You knew he had a whole family but you put your desires before each member of his family, both his wife and his kids. There are so many single men in this world, there's no reason why you had to get with a married man. From what you have said, I can't tell whether you just slept with him because you enjoyed the rush of knowing he was already in a committed relationship and liked the ego boost or whether you genuinely liked him. Either way, men in relationships are off limits! Now you're asking if he'll now do the same to you. Let's think about this why don't we. He cheated on his wife with you so we already know quite well that he's a man that does not value relationships. Or do you think you are better than his wife was so he had something to gain by leaving her for you? Sadly, that's not true, it's most likely that you were just one of the women in the world that would allow him to make you the 'other woman'. Another sad point is that there are more other woman like you out there, and he seems to know how to find them. So when the next one comes along, do you really expect him to not give in if he wasn't already searching? On top of this, remember this man can't have any respect for you as you made yourself very cheap to him. It was probably harder for him to cheat on his wife than it will be for him to cheat on you.

We have to be fair here. If you knowingly ruined someone's family, why do you deserve not to have the same done to you? Even though it sounds harsh, it's true. Life may not be the fairest to the people that don't do wrong, but it definitely likes to send back fired bullets to those who shot them. The point I'm trying to make here is there's a very high chance this man will in fact cheat on you with someone and when he does, you don't really have much of a right to be upset with it.

With all that being said, its never a bad idea to try to change your karma. Maybe try to learn from this and care more about how your actions affect others and in return, others may care more about how their actions affect you.

Best of luck,

Leanne