How do I tell her I don't want to wait?

Dear Leanne,

There's this girl who wants to wait till marriage to have sex. I'm not religious and I don't feel like waiting an eternity to have sex.

Because you don't seem like someone that enjoys waiting for things, I'll give you the short answer first:

If she doesn't want to have sex until marriage, and your'e not willing to wait that long, find someone else and stop wasting each others time.

Simple.

Now if you want the long detailed answer, keep reading.

I'm not too sure what the relationship between you and this girl is. I'm guessing you're a couple and not friends or have a friends with benefits situation because you seem to think sex with her should be included in whatever relationship you have.

Clearly you know this girl is religious. You should've been aware of this before you got into a relationship with her. If you weren't, then you clearly didn't spend enough time getting to know each other and rushed into relationship. It's a commonly known fact that most religions teach followers to wait until marriage to have sex. I'm sure you knew this before you got into a relationship with her, which you shouldn't have done if you personally are not okay with waiting till marriage. If you found out later in your relationship and were not okay with it, you should've left her then. But you didn't. You stayed with her and for some reason seem to believe she owes you sex. She does not. It's a personal choice she has made and you have no right to make her cross any lines she does not want to. Don't try persuading or convincing her why she should do it because there is no real reason she should. Even if you had been together 7 years, there's still no reason why you should pressure her into doing something that she feels uncomfortable with. It doesn't matter how long you've been with her. The only thing that matters is that you knew this would be a condition involved in being with her and you decided to get into a relationship with her anyway. That was your mistake and you clearly regret that. Don't now also make it a case that she ends up regretting something too when your relationship ends.

Truthfully, you don't like this girl. Or more accurately, you don't like her as much as she wants a guy to like her. She wants a guy that likes her so much that he is willing to put aside the fact that he won't be able to get to 'fourth base' until he's fully committed himself to her. Clearly, that guy is not you. And I hope that she is able to stick to her beliefs and realise, to find a guy that can love her as much as she wants, she's going to have to weed out the ones like you.

With that being said, if your sexual needs are important to you, find someone with the same mindset. Find someone that can fulfil all your needs, including sexual ones, and do the same for her in return. There are plenty of girls out there, and I'm sure finding one that is willing to engage in sexual activity before marriage is a lot easier than one who would rather wait.

If you don't want to wait an eternity to have sex, no one is forcing you to. The solution is simply to find someone who also doesn't want to wait an eternity to have sex.

Best of luck,

Leanne